Granddad was superstitious about books. He thought that if you had enough of them around, education leaked out like radioactivity.
- Terry Pratchett, Johnny and the Dead
Teachers daily calendar Sat/Sun 19/20 Dec 2009
School Satire
The Occupational Safety And Health Administration released figures today indicating that record numbers of elementary-school art teachers are falling victim to pneumosparklyosis, commonly known as glitter lung.
Characterized by a lack of creative energy and shortness of breath, and accompanied by sneezing or coughing up flakes of twinkly, reflective matter, glitter lung typically strikes teachers who spend at least twenty hours per week in an art class setting during the school year.
Until heavier, less toxic forms of slitter are developed, physicians recommend using alternative media to enhance children's artwork. Cheerios, cotton balls, and popsicle sticks are considered very safe. Avoid colored string, however, because some studies show that it could be high in yarncinogens.
- www.theonion.com
Teachers daily calendar Mon 21 Dec 2009
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